Beautiful Junk

My ear turns red, smashed against the pillow,
Bloodshot eyes stare blankly and I can't sleep,
Because all I need is my fill to flow,
To overtake my body; you surge deep

Through me, and I smile,
But I don't know why.

Light the candle, my spoon over your flame.
Carefully cook it up; euphoric gains
Circumvent negative thoughts and self-blame.
I feel your influence rush through my venis,

Through me, and I smile,
But I don't know why.

Mainline your pouty eyes; assuring grin
Overwhelms me and I stagger a bit.
Then it crashes down ,and I can not win
Your heart, but I'm hooked, and I need a hit.

No longer do I smile,
But now I know why.

Promise myself this time will be the end,
But seeing you shoves me off the wagon;
Again I'm addicted to you, my friend;
My ruin, my pain, but I'm having fun

When you and I smile.
But I don't know why.